It is probably impossible for children today to imagine only 3 TV channels and no kids TV on a Sunday. Black Beauty was the best Sunday TV had to offer in my day.

Before my baby was born, I was looking forward to the joys of CBeebies. I think I may have been crazy. Yes some of the programmes are brilliant, but when you have seen the same one 3 times in one day, you start to go slightly bonkers. I will admit some programmes I could watch endlessly. Timmy Time and Pingu are my favourites. Luckily for me, they are favourites of 3yo too! It is slightly disturbing though that he has a fondness for Waybuloo. Just what is that show about? I just don’t get it. Maybe you have to be under 5 to appreciate these things. I hate the dubbed voices, I hate the freaky floating creatures. I hate the fact that pretty much nothing happens.

I like kids TV programmes to be fun, bright and educational. Justin Fletcher seems to get it right. Mr Tumble is genius, Gigglebiz IS funny, Something Special teaches us sign language in a way that I and 3yo actually remember. I love the shows that give me ideas for what I can do with 3yo. I Can Cook – Katy cooks things that are healthy and fun to make. Kids cooking doesn’t have to be just Crispie Crackles. Mister Maker and Doodle Do have fun arts and crafts ideas that keep me and 3yo entertained. (Maybe they just keep the inner Blue Peter presenter in me satisfied.)

It is easy to let CBeebies become your babysitter though. The off button on the TV is hard to press, even when you are going nuts at the thought of watching Balamory AGAIN! Some experts say that you shouldn’t let your young child watch TV. Some say limit it. I agree that if your child is doing something else, don’t have it on in the background. It is a distraction that doesn’t help young minds concentrate on something else, and let’s face it, it can send mum potty! The CBeebies babysitter is useful when you are busy. It has it’s drawbacks though. The songs and theme tunes wafting in from the living room to the kitchen while you are making dinner, can have the effect of getting inside your head for hours. Anyone been humming the tune to Timmy Time – ALL THE TIME?

What do you think is the best and worst of kids TV?

We took so many photos of our baby, not wanting to forget a single moment. Now it seems to be artwork he brings home from nursery that is filling up the cupboards… can’t throw a single piece away though!

Recently the news was keen to tell us poor parents that “Pocket money ‘rose by 11p a week on average’ in 2009″* As if we don’t have to pay for enough things, we now have to give our kids more money as well?  

The Government gives babies a “gift” that they can put into a trust fund for when they are 18. We are then baraged by emails and letters reminding us to ‘top up’ their nest egg. “Just £10 a month will make ALL the difference.” I am sure it would, but £10 a month is a lot of money.

When do you start giving your kids pocket money?

I opened a child’s bank account for my baby when he was about a year old. I opened my 1st savings account when I was about 15. Times change. Once I had opened the account, I felt obliged to put money into it for him. So I set up a standing order from my account. I guess this is modern pocket money. It doesn’t stop me giving him all my loose change for his piggy bank though.

How much pocket money SHOULD you give your kids?

Should you give your kids the same pocket money as their friends, or stick to your gut reaction and just stop dipping your hand in your pocket? I really don’t know the answer. It’s not an issue at the moment. At 3 years old, pocket money is pretty meaningless. But when he starts school properly I am sure pocket money rates will be mentioned – time and time again.

What does pocket money mean?

My parents used to tell me that my pocket money was less than that of my friends as I didn’t have to buy my clothes out of it. (Don’t worry, I wasn’t still getting 5p a week, once I could count to more than 10!) Other kids did buy their own clothes – this is true. It still felt unfair at the time.

Does my child buy his own CBeebies magazine? – NO. Does he buy his own chocolate buttons? – NO. At 3 years old, it would mean nothing to him and I would feel very, very guilty making him raid his piggy bank for treats. I’m not sure when this will stop – I’m not sure it ever will.

How much pocket money do you give your kids?

Leave a comment below – are you a Mean Mummy or a Flash Harry?

Further information:

“Pocket money ‘rose by 11p a week on average’ in 2009″ BBC news article
More information about the Child Trust Fund

Some things to think about:

• 1st and most important. Do YOU want to be pregnant?
• Do you think he will be supportive and happy, or scared and unsupportive?
• Do you think he will need time to get used to the idea?
• Is there a friend he can talk to about it? Someone who is a Dad would be a good idea.
• Put yourself in his shoes. Will it be a total shock to him that you are pregnant?
• Have you ever discussed having children together?
• Your age, the strength of your relationship and your personal circumstances are important.

When to tell him you are pregnant

• Pregnancy lasts 9 months, but the sooner you find out, the sooner you should tell him. But don’t rush in – think about what you are going to say 1st. This is an important moment for him as well as you.

How to tell him you are pregnant

• Face to face is a good idea. He can see your reaction, and more importantly – you can see his!
• Don’t tell him when other people are around. This is a private moment between the 2 of you.
• You could tell him you think you might be pregnant, and do the test together.

Pregnancy test

Doing a test too early can give you a negative result when you are actually pregnant. They all seem to work pretty much the same, you wee on the end of the stick, then wait for a couple of minutes. Those minutes can last a lifetime though!

I really didn’t believe the test as the line was very feint, so I took several more. They all said the same. My Doctor said it didn’t matter how feint the line was, if there is a line, no matter how feint – you are pregnant.

Of course,  pregnancy tests are not 100% accurate, a urine test sent off to the hospital by your GP will tell you for sure.

This list below was sent to me by my health visitor. My son can do much better than some of them, and struggles with others. It is a good quideline though…  

Stages of Development of a 3 year old

Posture and large movements

• Can walk up and down the stairs, jumps from bottom step
• Climbs easily
• Turns round obstacles and corners while running
• Walks forwards, backwards and sideways
• Rides a tricycle using the pedals
• Can stand and walk on tiptoe
• Can throw a ball overhand, catches a large ball on or between extended arms
• Kicks a ball

Vision and Fine Movements

• Builds a tower of 9-10 bricks high
• Threads large wooden beads onto shoelaces
• Holds a pencil in preferred hand, copies a circle and a cross.
• Can draw a man with a head and one or two features
• Names and matches 2 or 3 primary colours
• Cuts with children’s scissors

Hearing and Speech

• Gives full name, sex and sometimes age
• Carries on simple conversation,
• Able to briefly describe present and past experiences
• Asks questions – Who?, Where? What?
• Listens eagerly to stories and demands favourites
• Knows several nursery rhymes to repeat and sometimes sing
• Counts up to 10 or more

Social behaviour and Play

• Eats with a fork or spoon
• Washes hands but needs adult supervision in drying
• Can pull pants and knickers up and down, but needs help with buttons and other fastenings
• Toilet trained through the day, sometimes has accidents
• Likes to help adults with domestic activities
• Enjoys floor play, with bricks, boxes, toy trains, dolls, prams
• Make believes alone or with other children
• Understands sharing
• Shows affection for younger siblings
• Shows some understanding between past present and future, ie yesterday, today and tomorrow

This is a really quick and easy craft idea. 3yo loves making this crown. It is really versatile as it can be made for a special occasion like Christmas, or just for fun with any odd bits of paper or card. Cutting out pictures from magazines looks good. As does painting the crown all different colours.

Here is a step by step guide to making the paper plate crown – which we made here as a festive Christmas Crown.   You will need:

1. Paper plate
2. Scissors

Then for decoration, either paint, or coloured paper/card and glue.

Glitter, tinsel, feathers, or leaves, could be used as well.

First start off by making your crown…

Now you are ready to start decorating!

1. Take a normal paper plate
2. Fold it in half
3. Cut from the middle of the folded part towards the edge, like pizza pieces.
4. Fold the pieces back to make a crown
5. Try it on for size!
6. Start sticking coloured paper, leaves, glitter, anything – onto the triangles
7. Add as much or a little onto your crown
8. You should now have a colourful crown

All it needs…  is little more bling – as it is Christmas we added some tinsel.

I am already imagining everyone sitting down to Christmas dinner, wearing these hats!  I like making this crown, as the variations are almost endless. Toddlers love making things and they can do almost all of this themselves. Cutting the paper plate with scissors, is the only bit I take total control of!

Great crafty idea from Ang at www.amumssurvivalguide.co.uk Thanks Ang!

]]> http://www.onlinemum.com/blog/making-a-festive-christmas-crown.html/feed 3 http://www.onlinemum.com/parents/how-does-it-feel-when-you-partner-becomes-pregnant.html http://www.onlinemum.com/parents/how-does-it-feel-when-you-partner-becomes-pregnant.html#comments Sat, 12 Dec 2009 23:09:29 +0000 Jane http://www.onlinemum.com/?p=1247

Online Mum chats to first time dad Dan. He has a young son and lives with his partner. I wanted to know how he felt about becoming a dad for the first time. Was he scared or happy did he worry or just breeze through his partners pregnancy?

Are you a Dad?

How did you feel when your partner was pregnant?

Let us know…

Transcript of the chat with Dan about his partner being pregnant

Jane: Hi thanks for listening in today. Today we are going to be chatting to a first time Dad  about pregnancy.

So, hi Dan, I’d like to first ask you about when you first found out you were going to become a  Dad, from that pregnancy test moment, and finding out your partner was going to have a baby.  What was going though your head,how did you feel?

Dan: I was the person who suggested that she took the pregnancy test, so we were both quite  excited. I remember after the pregnancy test, we got this very faint blue line, very faint,  fainter than what I expected it to look like. And even then, even though it showed a faint line,  I didn’t know 100% that it was definately, that she was definately pregnant.So we needed it  confirming by a Doctor a couple of days later.

Jane: And I presume she confirmed it.

Dan: She did, she confirmed it. we got a sample sent off to the hospital, and then they rang us  up a couple of days later and told us the news.

Jane: Briliant. So would you say your strongest emotion was excitement?

Dan: I was excited, because we were trying for a baby.But at the same time I was still scared.  Its a bit like, when that thing happens that you want, and you realise that it is true, you  become full of different feelings. Anxiety, nerves and then I was thinking “Im not ready to be a Dad” “Can I cope with being a Dad”

Jane: Did you go to books or the internet, or other Dads that you knew and talk to them?

Dan: Yes, one Dad’s advice was “Prepare for your house to be full of primary coloured plastic”  Which I think is very good advice. But on the internet, I think that sometimes, looking into  things too much gave me too many things to worry about.

Because there are a lot of complications  during pregnancy that I had never even thought about, and I would read these on the internet,  and it would scare me, and then I wouldn’t be able to tell my other half, the things that were  going on inside my head that I had just read on the internet.

Jane: That’s interesting, that finding out too much was making you more nervous. You would think  it would reassure you.

Dan: No, I didn’t realise all the things that could go wrong.I wish now, I hadn’t looked at all  different pregnancy websites, and I wish that I’d have just looked at good advice on good  websites (such as your own)

Jane: Thank you. My next question is about, as the pregnancy was getting further along, did you  feel pushed out? Because your partner was getting all the attention and it was all happening to  her. Did you feel that you weren’t part of the pregnancy anymore?

Dan: Yes, but I didn’t say anything! Yes, I did but, I know that pregnancy totally revolves  around the woman. But I felt as if I wanted to do the right balance. I didn’t want to do too  much that I was suffocating her and covering her in cotton wool. But at the same time, I needed  her to know that I was there for her every step of the way, and that I was happy to do anything  that she needed doing during the pregnancy.

Jane: Did you feel that you needed a more defined role as the future parent, and there were  certain tasks that you had to do, as potential father, well father to be.

Dan: Yeah, I think that, there are no books out there, that basically say “This is how to behave  when your other half is pregnant. I don’t think I would have read it if there was such a book.

I  think it depends on the persons individual relationship, how they are together and how they work  together. Like we worked quite well together, as a team.

I remember, when she started getting  big, she needed a hand putting her socks on. So that was something that I could do to help. And  her back was getting sore, so sometimes I’d massage her back because she’d get back pains. So it  helped that she was able to ask me for little things that she needed help with, but I was  willing to do anything.

Jane: Great, one final quick question. Did everything work out fine in the end?

Dan: It did thank you.

Jane: And you ended up with, was it a boy or girl?

Dan: We ended uo with a beautiful little baby boy.

Jane: Fantastic! Thanks for your time Dan.

Dan: Thank you.

This is so true – kids love sweet things. Why not, I love chocolate, but I don’t remember getting much chocolate or sweets as a child. Fridays were chocolate day. My Dad would bring home chocolate which we would all munch though after tea. Now the tables are turned. 3yo loves sweets, candy, chocolate, cake – you name it. Yes, we give him SOME, but when should a child 1st get candy?

Setting your children up with a sweet tooth too young?

One argument goes that giving your children sweets at a very young age will teach them that sweet things are good, and encourage them to reach for a chocolate bar instead of fruit when they are older and fancy a snack. The levels of obesity in children and young people surely bares out this theory.

Children need nutrious food, not empty calories

Children grow phyisically and mentally so quickly when they are young. It makes sense to give them food that will nourish their minds and bodies the most.

When is too young?

Having said that, it is easy to say, “I’m never going to give my toddler candy.” In practice, it is so much harder. They get chocolate selection boxes for Christmas, their friends eat sweets, they LIKE sweets. I guess my reaction is, in moderation it’s OK.

It also makes sense to never give a baby sweets. They really don’t need it and they could easily choke on something that isn’t totally soft. A small piece of chocolate that melts in their mouth is probably the best of the bunch.

Our 3yo really only gets chocolate even now. I worry about the effect sugary sweets will have on his teeth. I would prefer him to want grapes and raisins for a snack – and the majority of the time he does. Sometimes though, he just wants CHOCOLATE. Is it genetic? Sometimes it is just very hard to say no.

How old were your children when you 1st gave them sweets? Are you suceeding at holding off? Or do you just let them have what they want?

Flying when pregnant

• The safest time to fly is after 12 and before 25 weeks. (The 2nd second trimester)
• After 25 weeks (third trimester) there is a risk of an increase in blood pressure as well as the chance of giving birth prematurely. Every pregnancy is different so please discuss any concern you have with your doctor.

Tips for while you are in the air

• Wear DVT socks. This is good advice for everyone not just pregnant women. Wearing DVT socks can help prevent blood clots which can be life threatening if they reach your lungs.
• Keep well-hydrated, pregnant women are very susceptible to dehydration. Make sure you have a bottle of water with you.
• On long hauls get up and walk around at least every hour to help your circulation.
• Wear sandals or shoes with adjustable straps in case your feet swell.
• Wear loose, comfortable clothing.
• Rest as much as possible.
• Avoid tea and coffee, which may increase the risk of DVT.

Remember – plane seats are narrow so you may be uncomfortable.

Where should I go on holiday?

If you choose to go abroad:

• Avoid destinations located over 2000 metres of altitude, especially during the three first months; your baby could lack oxygen.
• Avoid destinations where malaria or yellow fever is common
• Avoid countries with inadequate health services.

On your holiday

• Take a list of names and numbers of people who should be contacted in case of emergency.
• Keep a list handy of the local hospitals (you can get this from the local embassy, tourist board, or your hotel).
• Keep out of the sun at the hottest times of the day between 12pm and 3pm. Your skin is more sensitive during pregnancy, so wear a higher factor of sunscreen than you usually need.
• Avoid diving and water sports while pregnant.
• Take a copy of your notes and take them with you – they contain valuable information that will be needed by doctors, in case you go into premature labour.
• Know your blood group in case of an emergency.
• Check with your airline and insurance company that they will allow you to travel when pregnant. Some insurers will not cover pregnant women or will impose conditions which you need to be aware of. Different airlines have different rules, but after 24 weeks, the airline may request a letter from your GP stating your expected delivery date.

Immunizations and diseases

• Make sure your immunizations are up to date, some immunisations are not safe to receive if you are pregnant.
• Infectious diseases are serious not only for you but also for your unborn baby.
• Malaria is particularly serious, it is important to avoid infected areas. These include India, Africa and parts of South America, among others.
• Travel in hygienic conditions.
• Be very careful with all of your food and water.
• Never take  any unknown medication.

Local health services

• Choose a country where local health services are good.
• Avoid destinations where malaria is common.
• Avoid mosquito repellents containing DEET. (Look for a natural alternative such as citronella oil or use nets to protect yourself from mosquitoes.)

Other related articles
Tell me about driving and travelling by train when pregnant
Health and beauty in pregnancy – what should I avoid?
Exercising, sports and other activities while pregnant – what should I avoid and why?

3yo and Teddy were having a nice game of pretend driving. They were going to the shops. 3yo asked Teddy to put his seatbelt on. This of course is a sensible request of any driver to their passenger – safety should always come 1st!

Except – shock horror – Teddy said “NO!”

Oh dear.

3yo dragged Teddy to the door. “Naughty corner Teddy.” “Stay there.”

3yo came back to the living room and got on with tidying his pretend car. Then after the required time, he went back to Teddy. “You sorry Teddy?”

It appears Teddy WAS sorry, he got a hug and he returned to the game. Both got into the pretend car, put on their pretend seat belts, and drove to the pretend shops.

What did I learn?

1. Always do as I am told by 3yo, or I will end up in the naughty corner.
2. Always put your seatbelt on when driving.
3. Imagination is WONDERFUL!
4. Discipline has sunk in. 3yo DOES understand.